Friday, November 11, 2005

brentagorium theorem

It seems I have stumbled upon a great travesty in this world. And the travesty is this: if one wants money, it seems you have to do the things you don’t want to do (i.e. work a sucky job). If you do the things you want to do (i.e. work a sweet job), you won’t get money. but if money = fun then perhaps its worth doing things you don’t want to do in order to facilitate doing the things you want to do in the future.

Another mathematical money theorem I have developed (which in Latin is called the “Brentagorium theorem ", similar, but unlike the Pathagorium theorem which was developed by the famous mathematician, Pathog, which is Latin for "The feeling, as of sympathy or pity, so aroused". May his soul rest in peace) goes like this: the more money you have, the more money you have. The less money you have, the less money you have.

And to all you college kids out there who have your parents paying your way through college-a special note: blessings, trinities, and halo's be upon your heads my children, for your end is surely just around the corner in the form of my fist. Some may wonder what may have aroused these feelings in me. Well let me tell you, the other day I was griping as usual at the cafeteria food (not because its bad, just because its the cool thing to do) saying that I cant believe I'm paying money to be ripped by the monopoly that is the caf (a semi-intellectual and original complaint I thought). So the kid I was talking to replied by casually, leisurely, nonchalantly stating that, "But I don’t mind cuz my parents are paying for it anyway”. In fact, he doesn't mind, because it is not him who pays for the food, but his parents-and the same for all his classes! And that my friends, is called natural selection. Some people have rich parents and some people have rad parents. Naturally, I have selected the latter.

9 comments:

Ryan said...

a good choice, i would say, in response to your parental selection. and as for the money thing, i too discovered you can either sell your soul to lucifer, who is the devil, and make good money, or you can work dream jobs and just barely survive- if you're lucky!

Cami Potter said...

good show brentsu...I remember one time at multnomah someone standing up in the caf. to ask if anyone had some spare change for a friend to do laundry. That part wasn't upsetting to me, more upsetting was the under-the-breath responses from the person I was sitting next to. He was pissed! He went off about how instead of asking people for change he should just write a check and get change from the school business office. I was shocked...I realized that this boy had never experienced not being able to write a check, that he totally misunderstood the situation that the guy that couldn't do laundry was in. He just thought that he didn't have any change, when in reality, he didn't have ANY change. In other news - be nice to rich people, they've no idea how much they are missing out on.

Polythene Pam said...

On the other hand if your parents don't make much money you get wicked scholarships and can go to school for like $1,000 a year whereas most who parents make higher income bracket salaries still can't afford the rediculous cost of today's universities, especially when sending 4 kids to college, and the kids also don't qualify for any scholarships at all. My only "saving grace" is the tragic early death of my grandpa which provided a substantial sum for each of us to pay for at least part of our schooling - still if I want to go to a private school, and I do, there is pretty much no way around huge loans cuz no one else is going to give me any money apart from my parents - even if I am a top student with tons of extracariculars and a passion for what I am studying.
So... there's two sides of the stick here I think.

heidi t. said...

my parents are mid-rich, thankfully paying for my schooling (but not my caf food. i learned my lesson the hard way about eating what come with the school my parents pay for *cough*tunabake) i'm mid-stupid, causing there to be a lack of scolarships in my life. and your parents are 100 percent cool. as is ryan's hair. i like how your brothers are so on top of your posts. way to be a family!

Kristin said...

What gets me are the freaks who don't even work whilst tromping through the joys of college life... and say then say they are too busy to do anything worthwhile (i.e. youth ministry, or inner city volunteer programs, or really anything of eternal value). Meanwhile I'm working one full time job, two part time, doing the whole school thing and two ministries. I just shake my head and feel sad for their for wasted time...perhaps I am bitter or proud. I'm not sure which. God smote me.

m.melissa.h said...

Huh, touchy subject.

Janice said...

there is one job at least in my opinion that is a dream job and pays a RIDICULOUS amount of money. and that is the film business. it is perfectly possible to work in the movie biz, not sell your soul to the devil, and make money. need i remind anyone that family films containing no violence, sexuality, or language, are the ones who spank the box office every time? AND for my other point (i am talkative and annoying so i get to have two) then there are the beautiful parents who realize their children have no money in the world and yet want them to have the future they desire. and they give them money. most of the time i wish i had to support myself because it's much more responsible and stretching, but the years it would take me to save up for film school? endless. okay i'm done.

chrissy2sheds said...

Is this theorem the same as ..a2 + b2 = c2 where c is the hypotenuse while a and b are the sides of the triangle. Anyway congats on your blog I'm afraid my job is what I think you define as a sucky one ..certainly was last week... but it hasn't generated enough to do whatI want certainly not an extended voyage or trip.I have 2 in mind 1. - to walk our coastal trail I can start from our house and 2.- to go to Peking by train just 5 changes from our local station. Changing the subject everywhere I look here I see people driving round in Friendee vans second hand from Japan!

Justin Nanfelt said...

Let me say this: Brent I love you man! I totally dig where you are coming from. And as an encouragement to you I feel that I am so inclined to quote a very good friend of mine from Capernwray last year who shared a room with me 2nd semester and is coming to my college in one week (i.e. you): "My dad is a flipping billionaire, and if he wants me to go somewhere, he'll provide. So why should I be worried?" Brent, that became my motto for life because money sucks, but I'm gonna kick butt with God anyways. And yes, my parents are rad too. The latter is where it's at. Like two turntables and a microphone.
Pace Fuori bro.